The night is darkest before the dawn

As I looked at all of the posts I have made to this blog, I realized that I really dropped the ball this time. It has been so long since I've written a blog post. I know I say that pretty much with every post I make, but it feels different this time. I was reminded about how important it is to focus on the one today. I know that I'm blessed every time I sit down and put one of these posts together, so even if I'm the only person who reads this blog, I'm going to write because its such a healthy, spiritual activity for me.

I've been thinking about trials lately; the hard times people go through. I've watched people bear the crushing, unrelenting weight of school, watched people pick up the pieces of their lives after losing someone, and I've watched the day-to-day experiences of life burden and weigh people down.

Sometimes people go through some pretty horrific things, but sometimes people come out on top of those struggles as well.

For a moment I'd like to talk about one of the people I look up to immensely; my Grandma Diane. Everyone who would be reading this knows that we lost grandpa a few months ago. Grandpa was such an integral part of our lives, and the impact of my losing him felt like a crater in my emotions and my soul; the impact was tangible. If grandpa going to the other side impacted me, his grandson, that profoundly, I can only begin to imagine what it would be like for anyone to be separated from their companion, even if the separation is only temporary.

As I look back, this is the lens that I've found myself seeing grandma through. I been aware of how grandma has been going through a trial I don't even have the capacity to comprehend.

The more time has gone on, the more and more respect I've gained for my dear grandmother. I've marvelled at how well grandma has transitioned to life without grandpa. I marvell at how strong she is, how much of a leader she is, how sweet and kind she is, and how I feel the Spirit around her, and I feel inspired while I'm around her.

As sorry as I am to admit this, it took a heart-wrenching trial for me to experience my grandmother's innate potential and increidble goodness. From my perspective, it seems as if grandma's potential has bloomed like a flower, and grandma is taking her place at the front lines of God's mighty army, where she belongs.

I may be wrong, but I suspect that since grandpa has gone, grandma may have come to realize some of these things clearly for herself. I also suspect that if she's reading this, she's thinking of all the tough nights, the times where she wasn't as strong as she wanted to be, etc ... but all I've been able to focus on is the greatness that I've seen. The greatness that I've seen as I've realized grandma is human just like the rest of us.

So this brings me to the lesson that I've learned. We've been taught from the ground up in church that trials bring blessings. It's one thing to be taught it, and it's quite another to watch miracles occur in me and others around me. One of the most intimidating things that has gone on in my life the last little while is realizing that it's time for me to step up, follow suit, and take my place in the front ranks of God's army as well. No more riding on the tail coats of amazing men and women like grandpa, grandma, and my dad. Time to step up on my own. More often than not, I don't feel ready, but every time, I look back and realize The Lord has blessed me immensely and helped me make it through the most important matters.

This blog is going to keep coming this time. I've said that before too, but before too long my desires will become a reality. Until next time! Love you! 

New Job

How's it going? There has been a crazy lot of stuff that's happened in the last week, and I wanted to write you a quick post to tell you about it and let you know what's going on.

For starters, I have gotten a job! It was the most whirlwind experience ever. It started on Linked In. A recruiter found me, and took it upon herself to get in touch with me and inform me of positions I would be a good fit for based on my skill set. 

One of the places was 180 Fusion, and I interviewed with them and I got an offer the next day. This was truly a miracle from God. I've been taught since I was little that if you put God first, He'll take care of you. I wouldn't tell you that I always put God first, and I would like to be a lot more obedient than I am, but God really does take care of His children. I am still a little in shock at how quickly it happened; just about a week and our lives have changed.

Just going to give you a quick update about the pregnancy, too :). It's going well. Rachel's starting to show, and the baby is indeed healthy. She's moving out of the first trimester, and she's feeling much better, which makes me pretty happy.

Just wanted to keep everyone in the loop; hope everyone's well :)

Michael White

Life's Lessons

Hey everyone,

First, I should tell everyone about how the baby is doing. Turns out he's doing just dandy! He/She is about the size of a doughnut hole now, and very real. Our doctor said that he/she moves around a lot. Rachel is feeling a load better as well now that there's not as much stress in her life (it's nice to be out of school)

I'm glad to be out of school as well, but it's back to working hard pretty soon!

I have a couple of interesting stories to tell you guys. I made one of the dumbest choices I have ever made a few weeks ago in my Operations Management class; I decided to skip a quiz. I though, “of course my grade will be able to take it, I've got something more important going on at the house”. The more important thing was my wife, and I don't regret it, but it was still a dumb choice. The quiz was 12 percent of my grade. All of a sudden I found myself struggling to pass a class, the first time that's ever happened to me. I found out that if I aced the final, I'd be able to get a C+ to a B- type grade, and I'd pass. So … my work was cut out for me. Lucky for me the final was open notes and open book. So what ended up happening is that morning I read my scriptures and went on a run to clear my head, and walked in there ready to take the test. It was the best thing I could have done. I was clear headed and stress free and I did really well! I am going to graduate! But yeah, don't ever decide you can skip a random quiz :/

I've decided life is a lot like that as well. I don't know if you're like me and when faced with a lot of decisions or stress, it gets really easy to just go with something or just take the easy way out. Well, I tried that and all it did was cause a lot of long-term consequences. So yeah, life requires us to be clear headed and to think things through, otherwise we'll experience a lot of consequences we don't really want to experience.

The other big thing that's been going on lately is the job hunt. I haven't been offered any full-time salaried positions as of yet, and that was a bit discouraging at first. However, an email from a wise friend inspired me. She told me that if I wanted to get hired, I should make myself qualified! So, now I'm completely into it. I'm writing a professional level website (I'm going to write myself a personal planner type website because I didn't have any other bright ideas), and I got a job at a company that's going to teach how to maintain and host a website of my own as I learn and help others do the same. I'm super excited to buckle down and learn more, but it's been a great spiritual experience as well. It wasn't enough to just go through school. I've had to rely on the Lord to help me rise to where He knows I can be. This has drawn me so close to Him, and I'm really grateful for it.

It's amazing where the Lord is taking us, I am really excited about it.

Michael White

Job Hunt!

Hey everyone!

I learned a lot about job interviewing the other day and I wanted to share what I have learned. I interviewed at a place called Xactware. One of my really close friends works there, and working there would put me in a position that's really close to home, and it would provide me a chance to be a better friend to someone who may be experiencing a lot of loneliness. Perfect, right?

Well, I remember my interview with Solutionreach. They asked me a whole bunch of questions about Java specific programming. I wasn't able to answer ... well ... ALL of them. Needless to say, I didn't get the job.

So yeah, this job that appeared to be a C# specific job intimidated me. I didn't want to go into the whole thing and flop it like last time.

Before my interview, I had the chance to eat my lunch with JT. He didn't tell me what to expect or anything, what he did say was for me to rely on what I DID know, my C++ knowledge. I lucked out that C++ is so similar to Java, but I realized that showing them what I do know is a lot more important that showing someone I know all of their answers. The interview with Xactware went super well.

I feel like that applies to the other aspects of my life as well. I know that I feel like I'm figuring life out, so for someone to come tell me that I'm doing everything all wrong ... I tend to shut them out pretty fast. That being said, If someone were to say, well, here's what I know, those kinds of things are so appetizing to me! For example, last week I was being really pushy with Rachel. I didn't even realize I was doing it, but I was trying force the way I believed on her. It just made things bad. Then my dad explained how he saw the world, and it made sense. I apologized to Rachel for how pushy I had been and the Lord healed our relationship, right then and there. COOL!

So yeah, the other thing that's been happening is some fierce games of words with friends. Mom and her family really like playing, so I have started it up. It's been fun, and I've learned a lot about the strategy behind scrabble as i've played. Face to face scrabble would be much harder, as you can't spend however long you want thinking about the move :)

Well, until next week! Love you!

Texas!

So this week I've spent the week in Texas with mom! It's been a pretty exciting week. Yesterday mom and dad let me take the boys to a movie. We went and watched Oz, the great and powerful. Pretty good show, but I learned a couple of things in the process:
1) its going to be a very rare occasion when I tell me children to "get whatever snacks they want". Yeah, the bill for snacks ran up to about sixty dollars. I was floored.
2) I felt a lot like Rachel and I were parents. Getting everyone there safe, organizing everyone to get snacks, and ushering everyone into the movie, I really felt like a parent. That's not easy. I felt like after I become a parent, the things that make me happy are going to be completely different than the things that make me happy now. I feel like seeing my kids happy is what is going to make me happy

I am starting to believe that everyone has innate goodness in them. I have a couple of stories I think are funny. First one was with my little brothers at home. Rachel and I took Jaidon and Jordan to see once on this island. A standard musical for the younger generation. Both Jaidon and Jordan were "too cool" to go, and only went because I encouraged them to go. But by the end, BOTH of them loved it and were glued to their seats.

Same thing happened when we went to see Oz, the great and powerful. The only reason the boys consented to go see Oz, the great and powerful was because Rachel and I don't like the same types of movies they like. So yeah, no one was all that excited, but by the end, both Blake and John (the two youngest) were glued to their seats. When Oz kisses the good witch of the south, blake yelled, "just kiss her already!". So funny. When Oz scared the evil witches away, John clapped. Super funny. But yeah, I think that people are naturally born different than the world. All of us are better than the circumstances surrounding us.

Found out I'm not as young as I used to be, either. Exercised with Dillan, Blake, and John this week. I was the slowest (but steadiest) runner of the three. I physically couldn't run as fast as they could. Then, the next day, I did muscle workouts with the younger two. I tried really hard to push the boys, but ended up killing myself in the process. This is why i'm going to be consistent about exercising. I want to get in shape. I'm going to do it.

Last thought, I realized this week that spending quality time with people is a proactive endeavor. If you don't make time for it, it doesn't happen. Clear as mud? The times I made the effort to spend time with the family was wonderful! had the funnest time playing charades. The young bucks got their butts' kicked by the married folks ;) Super fun :)

Well, until next time. Love all of you!!!

Michael White

Hey again! just sending you a quick weekly update!

So yeah, not much new has been happening lately, except for the job hunt. I'm graduating college in May, so its been time to look for a job. I have a few places that still look promising.

I may have a shot at a place called Xactware where my really good friend works. That would be a sweet job. 

I interviewed at a place right by Thanksgiving Point called SolutionReach. The atmosphere is really chill, and I'd enjoy working there I think.

Most I'm just really tired of being 2 1/2 hours away from the family. I feel so drawn to home, and I can't go home very often. We're ready to move back home.

Other places that might work out: The Church. I ran into them at a career fair today, and it seems promising! Super excited. Hill Air Force base in Ogden might also be a place where I could.

Haha, shoot we're just keeping our fingers crossed at this point. Just because one place looks promising doesn't mean much. I wouldn't feel comfortable placing all of my chips in one place, so we're working as hard as we can to do otherwise.

Well, as far as other things that have been new, I've been really enlightened about Marriage and my wife. Probably the best thing about getting married, period, is realizing that a wonderful woman like my wife has trusted me with everything. I get the honor of knowing what she thinks, how she feels, what her opinions are, and what means the very most to her. It means so much to me to know where she stands on all of the big things. As the days go on I marvel at what a thrill it is to be married to Rachel Virginia White. She's given herself to me, trusted me with everything. Rachel's so loving and nurturing that only places pressure on one of us. I love my wife, and I love how the Lord has granted me more knowledge about this.

That's about it for now. I can bear witness that the Lord gives us the strength to do things if we will simply seek them. The Lord asked me, a long time ago, to develop a few simple habits; exercise, meaningful scripture study, and working on the 12-Steps every day. I've been off and on, not really doing it as well as I should. He wants everyday. Well, he gave me a witness, after I was able to receive it, that the spiritual strength I get from doing those things is immeasurable. The question isn't, how can I find time to do them, the question is, how can I not? I have been much more consistent, and oh my goodness, I just feel wonderful.

Well, talk to you later everyone; thanks for letting me ramble!

Lots of travel and learning

Hey everyone! I've learned a lot of life lessons these past couple of weeks, and I would like to share them with you if I could.

The first experience happened a couple of weeks ago, as I was driving home from Provo. Rachel's mom had the chance to be in a podcast about near death experiences. I start listening to it. Pretty soon in my curiosity was really piqued. These people were talking mainly about actual experiences they've had when they've died, etc ... I've died before, and I wish I remember what I saw, so naturally I got really into it.

One guy said something really interesting that stuck with me. He said that before I had his experience, he thought that praying involved "getting on his knees and saying stuff". He then said that when he prays now, what he does is he is quiet and allows the chance for light and truth to enter his heart.

So ... I tried it. The rest of the way home, I was still, and listened. The Lord prompted me to bring my concerns to him, and I did. It resulted in learning a lot about things I can do to help other people. A lot of things. I was blown away by how powerful just being still was. I remember when I was a lot more of a rebel being still was something I never. How could I? The guilt of doing the things the Lord wouldn't want me to do would come back to haunt me.

when I got home, I was so happy, and Rachel and I enjoyed a blissful evening of just being together.

The other experience I wanted to share happened last Tuesday. I had the chance of spending the day in Salt Lake, as Rachel had a concert in Kingsburry Hall with the U of U Symphony. As I was visiting my grandma Hyatt, she told me how, for 38 years, her husband, Dallas, has written her love notes, bought her flowers, and in short did little things like that to show his wife he loves her. Grandma Hyatt does indeed feel loved. So much in fact, that there's never ever even a doubt in her mind.

I think about how sometimes I do that for my wife. Mostly I do chores around the house to show her that I love her. Well, I got thinking about how each time Rachel gets happy and feels loved, but what effect would it have on me if I were to step up my game, and be consistent for the rest of forever? The impact of little things that I don't think are too big of a deal would be become astronomical. This has left a deep impression on my mind.

Oh, and it was really fun to try and make coffee with my grandma. I really hope we put enough coffee beans in the pot :)

This lesson was strengthened as I visited my Uncle Maurice. My uncle Maurice is one of the greatest men I know. To the world, it may seem like he's a little rough around the edges, but like the people I care about the most, I couldn't care less what the world might think. He has a heart of gold. When I was growing up, I remember every holiday, birthday, Christmas, I would get a card from him. One day how much that meant hit me. Dad expressed his respect for Maurice for being so consistent in telling me he loved me. Once again, that idea of being consistent sunk deep into my heart.

I now have a much deeper desire to step up my game as a husband, to do more, and to be consistent. My personal witness of Elder Ballard's conference talk about beehives. The Lord has done a lot more to teach me about things His leaders say than I comprehend, I think. He has the most interesting way of getting things he wants me to now to sink into my heart.

Anyways, I love you guys, and I'm really grateful that I had the chance to talk about this. I hope you get something from it. I know I did.

Michael White

Almost Graduated!

Hey everyone! Figured I'd update my blog; it's been a while.

So, work is actually getting really really fun! Training had been slow. I prayed to Father and He inspired me to really take charge of my training. I spread myself far and wide, asking for work, and now I'm getting my own jobs, start to finish. This feels like the beginning of the rest of my internship. Starting now, I'm experienced enough to take on me own jobs; I look forward to work more and more every day.

This semester had proved to be a different sort of challenge. I'm not in any programming classes, so I figured this semester would be cake. Well, instead of programming assignments, I have readings due in all of my classes each period. So I'm actually a lot busier than I was. At first it was hard, but I have adjusted to it.

The biggest shocker, though, is my ethics class. I was "so" excited about it. It's a philosophy class, though, so we started reading a book from Aristotle, Nicomachean Ethics. Turns out the whole premise of the book is that the more good actions you make, the better of a person you are, the happier you'll be. Cool, right? This book just screamed Gospel to me.

I haven't been disappointed, not in the least. It's been the coolest book, And it's my favorite class. Here's some of the things I learned:
-Being good and being happy are the same thing, as being good allows us to experience joys that transcend physical pleasure
-we become good by consistently choosing to do good things; the things we choose to do become a part of who we are
-There are certain actions that are always wrong, and will never lead to happiness
-the characteristic of humans that make us special is our ability to reason, to make rational choices.

Like I said, cool book, huh? I've marveled and how close to the Gospel Aristotle hit, and I've eaten it up, it's been so edifying

I'll end with something I've noticed about my marriage. First, I have a great wife. Every days a good day because I get one more day with her. I've learned though that my attitude has had a profound difference on both of us, and vice versa. As I am happy, it is so much easier for Rachel to be happy, etc. The Lord loves us, and continues to be good to us. Well, I'll talk to you later!!!

Christmas and Work

Blog

So, I'm really bad at blogging, but here goes anyways! I wanted to give you guys a brief low down of what's been going on In my lately.

First thing that's pretty new is I now work as a programmer at RRDonnelley. I've worked there for about a month now. I was super stoked to get the job :) I'm really excited for the experience, and the income is proving to be a BIG blessing.

When I first got there, I wasn't sure what to expect, but now the job, I'm discovering, is right up my alley. I've been prepared well, and my boss assures me I'm doing well so far.

When I first started working, I was really, really nervous about working while going to school. How on earth was I supposed to have the time to do that? Well, funny thing, we've started to go to bed early an wake up early. We still don't have as much time for God as we'd like, but we do have enough time. I didn't think I could do it, but It happened :)

I'm also starting to enjoy work. The time flies pretty quickly now. Not much checking the clock, waiting very impatiently to go home.

The other thing that has been happening is the Christmas season. It's been busy to say the least. Been working hard on a couple of particular gifts; ill write about them later! I've been so focused on getting the people I care about the right gifts so much, and getting everything ready, that I haven't really had much time to think about much else. I'm super excited, though, to have a few days to just spend time with my family.

It been an interesting experience, to reflect for a few minutes and realize I've been completely lost in doing what The Lord would have me do; namely, spending time with those I love. You know what I mean? Makes me think I need to spend a few minutes really thinking about what the Christmas season is really all about. Well, talk to you later!!!

Michael

Change in Life's Course

So yesterday has thrown my life's plans through a loop. My plan in life was to get my master's in CS, then go and get an MBA and a doctorate in Business from BYU, then start my career. Now I'm really not sure. Yesterday morning was a startling reminder of how much I need to focus on school. I didn't do so well on a test. To make the day better, I also found out that I'm not going to be an institute teacher. On top of that, the Business College was advertising their one year MBA program. All of a sudden I was questioning what I wanted to do with me life. 

Today I'm going to meet with the advisor for the one year MBA program, and see what happens. Rachel has one year of school left, and it seems like a really good opportunity to walk out of USU with a Master's Degree, as my wife will be here anyways. 

Truthfully, I really don't know where my career is going to take me. I've felt the last couple of days that The Lord is putting forth His hand and is guiding me to those things that He would have me do; that he's letting me know what He wants me to be, one step at a time.

I would love less debt (I'll have to take loans out to go to graduate school, I'm pretty sure), but I also need to obtain as much education as possible. But yeah, as it stands right now, I'm going to go straight for my MBA and see where The Lord takes me. I'm going to keep an open mind and heart so I can be guided by The Lord in what I should do.

I tell you what, getting married is one of the greatest things that has ever happened to me. I surely do love my wife. Every single day, I marvel at how beautiful she is, how radiant she is, how pure she is, and how grateful I am for her love. Someone is our ward said that marriage agrees with us. I concur. Marriage is one of the greatest things ever. Spending every possible moment with my best friend every day hasn't proved to be a hassle; it has proved to be one of the greatest joys of my life.

Anyways, that's what's new. I am currently working as a computer science tutor. I have spent a lot of time learning and growing, and every day I am seeing improvement. Its really exciting to see. I am so grateful The Lord saw fit to bless me with some needed finanical assistance while at the same time giving me the chance to really strengthen my core knowledge of Computer Science.

I love you guys; thanks for the chance to keep in touch with you. Technology truly is amazing, as is the Gospel of Jesus Christ. 

Love you!!!

Hey there everyone!!!! I am so bad at keeping a blog, but I decided that I'm going to make time to do it, especially since its a great way to let everyone I care about informed about my life.

I've had an interesting experience I wanted to share with everyone today. Since the summer, I've been mulling over whether or not I wanted to work while I was at school. We seem to have just enough to take care of our needs as of right now, so I haven't been sure. However, once I finally decided to get a job, The Lord confirmed to me that I am on the right path ... I think. 

Right after I decided I wanted a job, a tutor position opened up in the computer science tutor lab. Guess who got hired? this guy did!!! I don't even need to work any evenings!!!!

After I got the job, I learned why I got the job. When I first started going through the CS program, I didn't really understand what's going on or apply myself as I should have. As such, the information mostly didn't stick. Well, as a tutor, I am going to be teaching other people those basics. I feel like one reason I am a tutor is because The Lord is providing me the opportunity to actually master the fundamentals that google has compensated for up until this point. Am I excited? Oh you bet!

I decided on something. I've gone to all of the teachers  that teach CS one and two, and a going to be doing the assignments the students are doing. This is how I'm going to master those fundamentals, plus it will make much more able to tutor the students. When I'm at work, I'm only at work, and I'm really excited about it :)

What else is going on in my life? Not a whole lot. I'm going through e seminary teaching program to keep my options open. It's been a great class. Mostly I'm just supporting Rachel. She's busy, so The Lord is keeping my schedule more open so I have time to cook and clean and support my wife when she needs it; she's really busy after all.

I most definitely love my wife most dearly. I am so happy to be with her. Life is pretty peaceful and just plain good, and that's pretty much it. Until next week!!!

Hey there everyone!!!! Last blog post before I'm married! Real quick, Kristin, I haven't forgotten about you. Life has just gotten in the way. Getting married with a full time job gets in the way of doing much else. So ... I guess I just wanted to write about some of the wonderful experiences Rachel and I have had together. Yesterday we went up to the apartment we're going to live in during the summer (I live there now, as it's five minutes away from where I work), and we started getting some of our things unpacked and moved in. Believe it or not, it has been quite a treat. I guess the only way I can think of to describe how it felt was that it just felt natural to be so close to living together. When we got engaged it felt the same way; it didn't feel weird at all; it just felt normal. Us getting married feels like another natural step in our progression. I'm really grateful for it. I'm sincerely glad that we have decided to wait as long as we have to get married; We're so much closer as a couple than we ever were in December. It has been the right thing for us to do. I don't how many people are actually going to read this, but I just wanted to commend Rachel and I's families publicly. They have worked so hard to make this come together. How hard they have worked hasn't escaped my sight; I'm very grateful for it. However, it's only been recently since i've actually come to undertsand a little bit about how hard they've worked to make things come together for us. I love Rachel, and I'm really excited to be marrying her. We had a concert at my place yesterday night, and I had so much fun. I love Jeremy, and I'm really grateful for all that he did. Rachel and I had such an amazing night! SPending that much time together with nothing but each other to think about was the most incredible thing. I love that girl. Anyways, next time I write I'll be sure to give you guys a run down of what we did on our honey moon!!!! Michael White

First Week of Work!!!

Hey everyone!!! I hope everyone's had a great few weeks! So, this week has been my first week working as an intern for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I must say, it has been a pretty good week. I really like the job! First thing, this is a very faced-paced job. It's the real deal. Just like any other job in industry. I don't know that for sure, because I haven't worked anywhere else, but the professionalism in the workplace is pretty amazing. Second, the atmosphere is fantastic. It feels good when you walk into work. I've been really impressed with the team I work with and the people I've met; so far, I've been the only one to get frustrated :). They're quite amazing! On top of that, my manager, Ted, made it clear that not knowing what's going on is just fine; he told me that he didn't expect me to know everything, but he did expect me to ask questions and to figure out what I don't know; how relieving is that! Since then, I've loved working here. The other thing that's pretty incredible is how nice the people here are; they understand completely when I have to leave for a few minutes to take care of things at home. I'm a service missionary, right? Well, I need internet to serve. Well, on Friday I had to leave at two to get my router from the UPS guys, and they were just fine with it! In short, the job is simply perfect; it is really challenging, and I am really going to stretch and grow academically this summer; on the other hand, I am able to support myself, and they allow me to get other important things done in my life. The other tangent I wanted to head down is how wonderful of a family I have. I had my bachelor's party today; we went and played laser tag, ate pizza, played frisbee. It was SO much fun, but the thing that really stuck out was how much my family and I bonded today; particularly between my brothers and my friends. The love that was felt today, oh how it was worth it! Today has been a pretty incredible day because of that love that has been felt, I think. Anyways, I'm just rambling as of right now. I have learned an interesting lesson on priorities this week. I felt like I juggled a lot last semester. Well, with a full-time job, I really haven't had much opportunity to do much besides work. It has left me to think that maybe from now on instead of trying to do all kinds of things, maybe I should try instead to choose which things are most important, and do those things very well. Anyways, I'll see you guys next week! Then it will only be a week until I am married! SO HAPPY!!!!! Michael White

Things are actually happening

Im doing this from my phone, so of there are typos I'm really sorry :) Auto-correct for ye lose, right? Regardless, this week has been a good week and I've learned a bunch of lessons. The first thing that's hitting me stronger and stronger every day is how things are actually happening. It's dead week right now, the week before finals. Well, the n of ye semester still seems a little surreal to me. I know it in my head, but I haven't comprehended yet that in a week and a half, I start my internship, this semester will be over, and I'll be married faster than I can sneeze. Mike did a fantastic job on the wedding announcements :). Just ... Wow ... I'm getting married! Well, I have exciting news! I'm going to the temple to receive my endowment tomorrow! It's a crazy story, and I've leaned a lot, so here goes: I have been planning this entre engagement to just get endowed a week before the wedding. Not a big deal, right? Well, ye other day it dawned on me that because I'll be moving into our apartment alone for three weeks, that would be a great time to go through the temple; having God on my mind at work, and t home, would be a great way to deal with the loneliness and intense pressure I'm expecting as our wedding draws near. Well, after talking to Rachel about this, it felt good, so ... Strate looking into getting endowed on finals week. Well, Bishop was okay with that on Sunday! So ... I called my grandpa to get things worked out. He couldnt do it on finals week. What do I do? This is where the lesson comes in. I figured I'd try to get endowed this week, but I felt strongly like I was throwing my time table on the Lord's, so I didn't expect anything to happen. Well, Tuesdy rolled around, and at 2.30 I stopped by my bishops office at my bishops office on campus. By six thirty I had my recommend. I had been told that they were hesitant to let someone pull out their endowments too soon before the wedding an ere I am, going through with t family ... Tomorrow!!!! So what's the lesson? I don't know as much about the Lord's will as I thought. I thought I knew what he wanted of me, but I was do convinced I shouldn't get endowed this week. Huh. Goes to show I need to work in seeking the Lord's will, and I think I'll start with step three. Being the corny, hopeless romantic I am, I am grateful I have the chance to start welding a spiritual bond with Rachel. I am SO excited to see where it takes us! I can't wait to get even closer to her!!! I just wanted to give her a shout out and tell her how special she is. Hon, you're incredible, and I love you very much. I'm completely flattered that you chose me to be your husband Michael White

What a good week

Hey everyone! Here's my post for the week!

I must say, Rachel is the most incredible woman on the planet. We had the most bonding experience last week, and it's thanks in large part to Rachel's goodness.

So here's how it went down; Rachel comes to me, glowing and ever so happy, and just tells me that she get it! She tells me that she knows what she needs to do, she promises to do it, and she told me like a hundred times that she loves me :). The thing was, you could feel the Spirit just glowing in her; whatever happened to her that night, it's been incredible and blessed us exceedingly.

We haven't been the same since. Because of that, I learned an incredibly powerful lesson, one that has changed me. Rachel is the greatest woman ever, and I have struggled with feelings of inadequacy; especially after Rachel just gets even better at times like this.

Well, I finally realized that the point isn't for me to be my best self to deserve Rachel, the point is for us to become our best selves, together, relying on each other and Jesus Christ. The point? I learned that I really CAN do anything because I have Rachel in my life. Working together with her, supported on the foundation of Christ, I really can do anything, even let go of my imperfections, even keep my head high when I fall short of my expectations. Rachel's just wonderful; We're going to have such a blissfully happy life together; I love her so much.

School's going good, and I can't wait to get married. The closer we get as a couple, the harder it gets. Ugh. The next six weeks (on the dot ;) ), are a challenge I'm looking forward to conquering.

I learned a great lesson that I'd like to share before I end my post for the week. I felt in conference that I should write down the impressions of the Spirit I get. Well, put simply, I feel like a new spiritual man as I have done this. It's incredible to know how many promptings the Lord will give us in our lives as we listen. We had a lesson on stress management in my business class. I felt like I had stress management down, so I wasn't paying attention. Well, I had an impression that if I would study the handout she gave us, I would learn ways to improve how i do things. By writing it down, it's been impressed upon my mind much deeper than had I not wrote it down. Same thing goes with all of the other things I've written down. I've been blessed with a closer relationship with the Holy Ghost, and that's incredible.

I love all of you, and I thank you for taking the time to read my blog. I hope you all have a fantastic week! Kristin Groner, Rachel and I are coming to see you once you get home!

Michael White

Job Hunt

Hey everyone!!!! I had an amazing week that had some pretty powerful lessons in it.

First!!! ... The good news ... I got an internship with the Church's ICS Department!!! Meaning, I have a software engineering internship for the church this summer!!!!!

The journey was interesting, though, and I'd like to tell you about it if I could. It started with getting a call from them saying that some more managers at the ICS Department were saying they wanted some more resumes, and to spread them, they needed my permission. This was amazing in of itself, but my initial Impression was that this would be a fall internship, not a summer internship. So once this became a possibility, Rachel and I needed to decide what we would do if the internship became a possibility.

With a fall internship came the necessity of pushing back my graduation a semester, so I counseled with my dad, my grandpa, Rachel, and came to the conclusion that it would be a good idea; they have benefits to put you through school, so putting graduation off a semester was worth getting my foot in the door.

Then I found out that the internship was for the summer. So what do I do? I had already accepted an internship in Provo, which would further develop my iPhone and iPad developing skills. Which was the correct choice?

The problem I found with this decision is I was worried my biases were clouding my judgment. As I prayed about the issue, I felt strongly like the choice was my choice. This didn't help. I'm really grateful that everyone let me work through the issue on my own. When it came down to it, the choice was clear; work for the church.

I'm just grateful for the experience. I've never had to make a choice between multiple good choices before. It has been a good week, and now I get work on the Joseph Smith Papers Website. See you next week!!!!!!!!!

Michael White

I am back for the count!!!!!

Hey everyone!!!!! I've learned some key lessons about how to manage my time; I learned that spending a lot time trying to find time to do stuff really isn't that productive; I've found that just jumping into the middle of things has resulted in my getting a lot more done. So ... I'm going to keep this blog up to date :):):):):)

There are a couple of things on my mind at the moment, so I figured I'd share them with you. The first one is Rachel. I remember when we were saying "nine more months until we get married" now it's less than two months away!!!! I sure do love her, and I'm going to be really relieved when we finally get married.

The other thing that has been on my mind has been a lesson my roommate taught me last night. We were talking about the line between being a good example and forcing beliefs on others. He told me (I'm paraphrasing), "Mike, it's a lot more important that people have their own experiences with God than it is to share your experiences with them. Doing that is really not that hard. All you need to do is be friends with people; they will see the way you live, what happens I your life, and they will see the differences between you and them"

I'm not insinuating that I'm a saint or anything, but I learned what I needed to learn as I read the Book of Mormon. Here's what I learned; there are two key components to making a difference in other people's lives; 1) we need to live our lives the way god would have us live them and 2) just love people.

That brings up an interesting dilemma in my life at least. There are so many amazing people in my life that I love and want to spend time with, but time is something I need more of! I havent come to any conclusions on how to solve this yet; as far as I have been able to tell, all we can give is our best efforts, and the Lord will magnify those efforts.

I love you all, thanks for listening!!!! I'll talk to you next week!!!

Michael White

Well, just wanted to take a quick couple of minutes and say how grateful I am that life is already better :D It only took a few short hours. Everything is back to normal and all is well :D :D :D I'm really grateful for it. I love you all

Hello again!!! I know I don't edit this blog enough, but here's another post while i'm thinking about it.

Can I just say that the Lord is one of the most amazing people in the world! I know that's a duh statement, but so many things have happened lately that I've been able to keep a good attitude about, and I owe it all to Him. Rachel and I have been dating and such, and life has been really good. Well, we've started to get a lot of pressure to not date. Details and such don't matter, but what does matter is I've been able to keep a good attitude and forgive the people who have been giving Rachel such a hard time.

Rachel and I were having a crappy night last night, and that ended up becoming one of the greatest experiences of our relationship. We were both feeling really down, and worried, and such, and didn't know what was going to happen. It was really crummy. Well, all of a sudden Rachel's fears were all gone and such. Instantly. I was amazed. And the whole time I had been given the strength not to freak out. In the end, it became a really cool bonding experience for us, and i'm really grateful that it happened.

There are other things that are trying me at the moment, but I rejoice in the fact that because of Christ, I can keep a positive attitude and a happy, upbeat outlook on things. I'm really grateful for this. Life will get better; and it will in fact slow down. Summer classes are almost over, and I'm so grateful for it. I'm making this final push next week, and i'm going to try and get my online classes done early as well. I am so excited!

You guys are amazing, and again, sorry for not updating this more

Michael White

It's been way too long since I updated my blog; that changes now :D This will be an every week occurrence from now on; I promise. Well guys, life is absolutely amazing! A lot has happened since I last posted an update. Rachel Hansen, a Paysonite, came into my life, and i'm the happiest guy in the world because of it. I don't know guys ... i've never felt this way about a girl before. We ... man from the first night we actually sat down and talked to each other, it's been one amazing bonding experience after another. How did we meet? Well, church. We'd known each other as acquaintances for the whole school year before we actually got to know each other. Well, one Sunday, I sat down next to her and just gave her a compliment. Little did I know it, but that started a marvelous friendship. I ... we just started talking, and we didn't stop talking. Before we knew it, we were a couple, and before we knew it, we realized we really cared about each other. Grandpa Anderson really summed up how I feel; he mentioned to me one day that we really connect. That is definitely true. Even from day 1, it felt like I had known her my whole life. Things are now starting to get serious. I really, really care about her and I can't wait to see where the future takes us. We have so much time until anything will happen; her brother needs to get home from his mission (a year from now) before anything happens. Well, that's fine with me. I ... shoot guys, it's going to be such a fun year. I can't wait. In fact, I'm itching for her to give me the ok to drive up to Payson so I can see her :D.

In other areas, my goal to work for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is going really well. I recently emailed Todd Steadman, a recruiter who went to Utah State last semester, about what app the Church wanted me to write. I figured it'd be a really good idea to write an android app; anything to slap on my resume is a plus in my book. So yeah, that's what I decided to do. Well, Mr Steadman suggested that work on an app with him and his department. I signed up, and i'm really excited for it. I had no idea I was actually capable to help them, but I am. It's going to be a stretch and a really good learning experience. The other thing that I was pretty excited about was while I was at the Riverton Office Building, I found the email address for the intern recruiter. Well, point being, i'm going to do absolutely everything that I can to work for the Church. I really want to; what better way to spend my career? That being said, it's really not up to me, you know? I press forward with the best way I know, and things will work out the way they need to. When I graduate from Utah State, I will be able to be an institute teacher as well, so if that works out, then I would accept that job in a heart-beat. I love teaching, and a career of teaching the gospel would be absolutely amazing.

Life is just good. I'm happy where I am, and I just have to press forward. I'll learn what I need to learn, and I will grow the way I need to grow. Well, I'll face whatever comes my way. The biggest thing, I think, is I just need to have faith. I do my best, but sometimes I just need to slow down. You know? Well, that being said, I will fill you in on all of the juicy details next week!